Katarin's Story

 

Today you are going to get to know Katarin.  The whole team knew Katarin almost immediately after hitting the ground. She is one of those kids who makes herself known. 

 Katarin is the older sister of little Rosa who you met in the last post. She is three years old, which in Nicaraguan years must be closer to 10 since as far as I could tell, she was responsible for not only herself, but for her two year old sister. 

Although she is from the same family as Rosa, she is very different. She has a sparkle in her eye. And she smiles.   And she is spunky!

Katarin has learned to fight and scrape for what she gets. I very much believe that that is out of necessity.  She places herself strategically where she is sure to receive the most benefit. Whether that means butting in front of people to be first in line, screaming at the top if her lungs "a mi! a mi!" when we were passing stuff out,  making a new front row with her chair if she isn't in the front, or even bumping her little sister out of her chair if necessary...Miss Katarin did not show a lot of respect for boundaries or an abundance of manners when it came to getting hers. 

 Is that normal behavior for a three year old?  Yep, absolutely!  But where as most little ones make a couple of shots at it, have their efforts thwarted, and then fall into line, Katarin is relentless. 

 I got talking to our translator one day about how hard it was some times to convince the kiddos- even the older ones to share. Her insight, which was very helpful to me, was that a lot of times, in communities such as this, the children are instructed not to share their things, because they don't get them back, and the families cannot afford to replace them. That makes sense, but what a sad thing to feel compelled to teach your children. While we American moms make a huge deal about sharing, our counter-parts in disadvantaged areas are teaching just the opposite. And I know for my children, there were penalties for not sharing. I can only imagine what a penalty might be for a Nicaraguan child who lost their stuff.  

 But I think that's not the whole story here. Because Katarin seemed to take it to another level.  Not only did she not want to share stuff, she didn't want to share us. 

She was literally the first one there every day, and was still hanging around each day as we left.  If we were seated, she was trying to get in our laps.  She was in our faces non-stop. It became really apparent that this little 3 year old just plain wanted attention.   Good attention, bad attention, she would take any kind of attention she could get. She got braver an braver as the week wore on. She liked putting the crayons in her mouth.  Since we were teaching about germs, I would ask her not to put them in her mouth. She would do it again, I would ask again. Then it got to the point that she would wait until I was looking at her, open her mouth really big, cock her head at me and slowly move the crayon to her mouth.  What a little toot!  Then, she got braver. She would poke us in the rear, or grab something away from another child, then when asked to give it back, turn around and stick her hiney out at us, and make us chase her.  

I chuckled on our way back to the drill sight several times that she was going to be famous some day. An actress, a politician, some sort of career that enjoys a lot of recognition. Because that was what this little girl was all about!

 Then, we witnessed something that explained a lot of why she craves attention. It was something that I think will haunt me for the rest of my life. 

Katarin fell into a ditch near the drill site. She and another child. Wow, those little three year old lungs can make some noise. She screamed bloody murder for a long time. See, she's going to be an actress, right?!?  But she didn't stop. It soon became obvious that she was really hurt. Her arm was not right. It looked twisted. Did she break it? Dislocate her elbow?

 The preacher happened to be at the drill site that day, and since he travels back and forth from Managua, he had a motorcycle with him. So he hops on his bike and goes to find Katarin's father, who was out working in a field. His response was "There's nothing I can do about it."  Stop the presses!  He said what?  Are you kidding me???  I was absolutely stunned. What even mediocre parent says that?  Your 3 year old is injured and in pain, and you can't do anything about it? Righteous indignation had NOTHING on me at that moment. And want to talk judgement?  I was all over that like white on rice!  But wait, it gets better!  The preacher goes and finds Grandpa. Grandpa agrees to take her to the doctor. OK, good. Things are looking up for little Katarin. Wrong!

 About 15 minutes later, I look up and she is at her house waiving at me.  I don't know about any of you, but can you get to your doctor, be seen, possibly x-rayed, and then get home, all in about 15 minutes?i

 So I go over and get her. She is very excited because she has a coke!  I walk her over to the area where we were doing our stuff with the kids. Theresa talked to her and asked her if she went to the doctor. She said yes, and the doctor said no. We didn't get that. She said her arm didn't hurt anymore. 

 But as she played, the team members noticed that she wasn't bending her arm, and her hand wasn't right. And her elbow just didn't look right. It was dislocated. 

Lauren and I tried to play the little game with her where you hold their hands and swing them. Our hope was that her little arm would go back in to place. (Yes, Lauren does have medical knowledge). As soon as we tried, she started crying ¡no puedo! (I can't!)

 So, essentially, dad did nothing, and grandpa bribed her with a coke. And then, she, A THREE YEAR OLD, wanted our attention so badly that she put that above the pain she was feeling and came back to play. 

 That was our last morning there. We had to leave, not knowing if she was going to get the treatment she needed. I will always wonder.  Did she?  If not, what are the long term affects?  Will she become even more disadvantaged because of a physical impairment?  Will she ever get the attention she so desperately craves?

 As a parent, I have done a lot of thinking about this.  My strong inclination is to judge - judge dad, judge grandpa - even mom!  But really - with all the people that we know are living in dad's household - did him being in that field make the difference between that family eating or going hungry that night. Would it have jeopardized the job that he needs just to keep his family from starving?  Did he feel a horrible sense of guilt and shame because he couldn't care for his daughter?

 Again, I will never know. I know that I would move heaven and earth to help my hurting child. But my earth and his earth are very different places. I just hope that he has faith or finds faith in Jesus Christ as his savior, so that we can all enjoy the same heaven. 

 

May my steps be worship. May my thoughts be praise. May my words bring honor to Your name.